Happy Easter

Happy Easter indeed. The first of many without my precious Gabriella - but I'm sure she is somewhere celebrating this day more magnificently than we can imagine. I still miss her. Maybe this year we would have dressed her up as a little bunny. Because she'd be home by now, you know. Home with us. Not in the NICU, and not 'home' as in heaven. Home with me. We would have made her a little Easter basket, even though she would still be too little to understand. We would have taken her to get pictures with the Easter bunny, maybe at the mall, and read to her a children's book about the true Easter story. She would be smiling by now. Maybe starting to roll over. Or maybe she would have done that a long time ago - I'm guessing off of her adjusted age, but after all it has been 5 months since she was born. Just two since she should have been born. She would be so big now. Maybe ten or twelve pounds. Because she was only two when she was born. I can't even imagine her that big. She was so tiny. So perfect.

Brie, wherever you are, whatever you're doing today, please know that mommy loves you and misses you. I wish you were here with us.